Simply Be Kind

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Lisa Alioto

13 April 2021 20 comments

It sounds easy enough, doesn’t it?  Be kind to yourself and those around you.   But in reality, at times it can be one of the hardest things to do.    But, also one of the most rewarding things to do.

Be Kind to Yourself

Often we are our own worst critic.  We know and cite our faults during rough patches, we discard compliments quickly, and dwell on criticism.   It seems like it’s human nature to do these things, but I reject that though.  I think it’s a learned habit and one that we should break.

Being kind to ourselves should be one of the most basic, core things that we do for ourselves daily.  Selfcare is the epitome of being kind to ourselves.   It’s, as they say, always putting on our air mask on a plane before helping others.  In other words, the best way to be there for ourselves and others is to first make sure we are in the position to do so.  At that point we are most valuable to ourselves and others.

So, next time we are going through a tough time, let’s focus on what’s going right.  What we did right to get to that point rather than focusing on everything that went wrong.   The more “rights” running through our mind will carry us further, boost our confidence, and motivate us to proceed.  In contrast, focusing on the wrongs can sometimes have a halting effect on our behavior.

In short, be kind within and you will find your bucket will run over in your ability to be kind to others as well.

Be Kind to Others

Being kind to others comes naturally for some of us and takes a bit more focused effort for others.  Regardless how we come to it, it’s one of the most rewarding acts that we can participate in.

It’s easy to reciprocate kindness.  It’s harder to initiate kindness, especially with a stranger.  But often these are the acts that are the most meaningful.  Holding the door open for a stranger, leaving extra money with the cashier for the person behind you in line, and smiling at someone that looks a bit lonely.  While relatively small, all are great acts of kindness that can have a truly meaningful impact on someone’s day.  In fact, it’s usually not the grandiose acts that have the biggest effect on someone, but the little random acts of kindness that do.

Most rewarding of all, and kindest, are the acts that go to those that are a bit harder to give them to.  Perhaps a friend you just had a fight with, a fellow student that criticized your work, or a colleague that took credit for your project.  It’s these moments that we have the opportunity to really show our character, a character of forgiveness and kindness.   It’s these moments that often mean the very most.  While they perhaps don’t come along as often, these are the moments that can impact not only perception of people but of life for some.  And be ever so rewarding to us.

Let’s be that person! 

I’d Love to Hear About Your Random Acts of Kindness

What acts of kindness have you recently partaken in?   Did they come easy or did you have to push yourself given the circumstances?  How did you feel afterward?

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20 thoughts on “Simply Be Kind

  1. This probably doesn’t count, but simply putting up with the constant phone calls from my mum is probably my biggest act of kindness. I hate talking to her and doing so is terrible for my mental health, but she’s lonely, because the person she is pushes everyone away, not just me. Now we’re stuck in lockdown, and my mum’s heavily compromised immune system due to having cancer recently, she won’t be able to leave her home for a very very long time, so here I am, putting up with talking to her, even though I hate it

    1. Lisa Alioto

      I most definitely think this is an act of kindness – I think it falls, from your description, as one of the harder acts of kindness. Oftentimes, those are the most valuable kinds, even if you don’t see/hear the value from the other. They may still feel it.

    2. Louise Daniel

      Thank you for commenting and for being so open.

      1. Lisa Alioto

        You are very welcome – thank you!

  2. I love the air mask analogy a lot. It’s such a simple way of explaining what it is we mean when we talk about the importance of self-care. Although I am definitely getting better at trying to give myself the care I deserve I definitely agree that we all, including myself, could initiate kindness more. Thanks for sharing this!

    1. Lisa Alioto

      You are welcome Piper Hill – I’m glad to hear you are getting better at self-care. It’s so important and each of us is so deserving of it.

  3. As a Nurse, being kind to my patients especially the ones that warm up to me after being rude at first is so something I find so satisfying and the feeling I get from that has been so rewarding even more than the pay. So, I agree that kindness does have a way of making you feel better.

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Turning around someone in a not so great mood into a better one – there’s no great feeling. I totally agree Rebiah!

  4. Being kind to yourself is so challenging sometimes! But like you said, it’s important. We deserve the kind of love that we give to others!

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Absolutely Jennifer!! Selfcare is so key!

  5. I guess my act of kindness for others has to be staying home right now because that’s pretty much all I’m doing! I’m ordering my grandparents’ groceries for them every week at the minute, but I don’t think making sure they’re well fed quite counts as a random act of kindness. I think a lot of us struggle with being kinder to ourselves, I’m sure most of us would be happier if we decided to treat ourselves the way we treat our friends/ family x

    Sophie

    1. Lisa Alioto

      That is a very kind thing you are doing for your grandparents – I’m sure they really appreciate it Sophie! 🙂

  6. I love the air mask analogy! Really gets that message across. I’m not particularly comfortable around strangers, so random acts of kindness are rare, I was taught as a child to always hold the door though, which I still do every time.

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Good for you Adam – every act counts! What comes around goes around 🙂

  7. Love the positivity in this post and the warm message. That in itself is an act of kindness 😉
    Lovely read!

    Anika | chaptersofmay.com

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Awwww…. thank you Anika!

  8. Oh, I couldn’t agree more with the post. I think your actions definitely reflect who you are as a person and being kind should be on the top of the list. You can definitely tell false kindness! I work in healthcare, where you always have to put your patient’s first, but it can be so tough when they are not as polite back. But, that is the nature of the world and it doesn’t put me off trying to spread a bit of positivity!

    Thanks for sharing!
    Aimsy xoxo

    1. Lisa Alioto

      I love that Aimsy!

  9. Great post! Very insightful and inspiring!

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Thank you Ria – I really appreciate it!

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