Wanting to help others, give to others, do things for others isn’t a bad thing. In fact, it’s something that we should all be aspiring to. However, there comes a time where if you don’t rest, you’ve got nothing left to give. Recently I’ve been learning that it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes.
It isn’t selfish
I always used to think that taking even the slightest bit of time for myself was selfish. That by taking time for myself I was neglecting to help others. But that’s simply not true. If I don’t take time for my own rest, that’s selfish because I’ll be helping people from a place of emptiness and that’s no way to be helping people. Putting yourself first at times isn’t selfish. In fact, it’s necessary.
Please don’t feel guilty
So many times, I’ve made myself feel guilty because I’ve had to put myself first. But, you should never feel guilty for looking after yourself. It’s important to have healthy boundaries so that you’re looking after yourself and not burning out. Boundaries are a good way of preventing guilt because you’ve already set out the time that you’re going to spend on yourself before anyone tries to make you feel guilty for not being able to do something. Repeat after me “I will not be made to feel guilty for putting myself first.”
But how do I put myself first?
I think that sometimes we can get so used to putting other people before ourselves that we forget how to put ourselves first. Putting ourselves looks like taking time to rest, making time for self care (you can read my blog about 10 easy self care tips here) and saying no to things that you just don’t have the capacity to do.
It’s okay to put yourself first sometimes. You can’t give when you’re running on empty, and people can’t expect you to do so. Take time for you. Let yourself rest. And more than anything, don’t let anyone make you feel guilty about it.