Is Crying a Sign of Weakness?

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Lisa Alioto

26 January 2020 28 comments

Quite to the contrary, crying is a sign of strength.  Letting ourselves be a little vulnerable and giving ourselves that release is not only a sign of confidence, strength and bravery, it’s also quite healthy.

I’ve often heard the phrase real men don’t cry.  To me, the better phrase is men do cry too!  In fact, I think we could all use a good healthy cry every now and again.  Sometimes it’s the best way to release pent up feelings that otherwise could bottle up into something bigger or come out in an unhealthy or harmful way.

If you’ve read at least a few of my articles, you will know that I often say that every emotion has a purpose.   Fear signals us to proceed with caution; guilt serves as our moral compass, and tears…. well, they are a sign that something has hurt or disappointed us.

Lets face it, life isn’t all roses.   Hurt and disappointment happens.  Sometimes moments of growth can follow it.  Sometimes, it’s just simply pain that needs an outlet.  Giving ourselves this outlet by crying can literally be a way of “washing away” some of the pain being felt.

Quite often though we stave away the tears and try to “tough it out.”  Admittedly, this can be quite helpful at times, especially when tears are not appropriate for the occasion.  Holding in our feelings as a general practice though can oftentimes be unhealthy.  It can cause our feelings of pain, hurt, and disappointment to accumulate, bringing us to a breaking point.   None of us wants to go there.

I think that it takes bravery to let ourselves embrace each moment, the good and the bad.  I used to be the type of person that bottled up my feelings but as I’ve aged, I’ve quickly come to learn that no good comes from doing that as a general practice.  It would cause me to build up resentment toward a particular person or thing.  It would also cause me to “sit” with angry feelings for an extended period of time.  A period of time that was not necessary if I just let myself “live in the moment,” be a bit vulnerable and express my emotions.  Whether that means a good cry, a courageous conversation, or a heart-to-heart moment with a loved one, the outcome of taking this route has always produced better results for me with both the relationship and with my own emotional health.

And let’s not forget that tears aren’t just associated with pain or disappointment. There’s always tears of joy! And those are tears that are worth celebrating!  Just like these great discounts!

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28 thoughts on “Is Crying a Sign of Weakness?

  1. I cry when I’m so angry. It helps me calm done and act as nothing happened, not a sign of weakness but comfort. Thanks for the great post.

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Yasinta – that’s a great point! Crying can be a release leading to comfort as well.

  2. I’m working on being mindful. Noticing and accepting the feelings I am having. I find that it’s so much harder to sit with my anxious, sad, angry, etc feelings. While I know in my head that it’s okay to feel these feelings and that no feeling is better than another, it’s so difficult to really live it in my mind, body, and heart. Allowing a good cry at times it comes up, does seem to be a way to allow it to pass through.

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Katie – it sounds like you are on such a healthy journey! Allowing a good cry when needed, I agree – it’s a great release.

  3. I totally agree with you that it can actually be a sign of strength in recognising your own emotions and isn’t a sign of weakness. Although, as you said, it’s not appropriate for all occasions so I understand why people feel the need to tough it out x

    Sophie

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Exactly – I completely agree Sophie! Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

  4. Crying is definitely a sign of strength! It’s a sign of vulnerability, which is on its own a strength.

    1. Lisa Alioto

      So very true Kate!!

  5. I definitely cry when I am angry and/or overwhelmed. Thanks for this very insightful post!!

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Me too! It’s such a good release! Thanks for stopping by Natasha!!

  6. One of my clients is a confidence and human behaviour coach and she always says those who refuse to cry refuse to heal. Such a good way of looking at it, I think. So yes, I completely agree with you 🙂

    1. Lisa Alioto

      That is an interesting way of looking at it. Crying can be sooo healing! It’s such a release and it’s a sign that you are dealing with the issue in the moment that you are ready to do so. Thanks for sharing Lisa.

  7. This is so true! Sometimes it takes a lot of strength to allow yourself to get it out. Thanks for sharing!

    1. Lisa Alioto

      It sure does! I’m glad you enjoyed the article Jen!

  8. I definitely see crying as a release and I do feel better mentally after having a good cry.
    I don’t think bottling up emotions is a very healthy thing to do

    Olivia | http://www.heylittletulip.wordpress.com

    1. Lisa Alioto

      I agree with you Olivia. Sometimes if we bottle up our emotions they come out in unhealthy ways – or are simply unhealthy to our internal selves. Neither is good. 🙁

  9. Fab post. I think crying and showing your emotions is a strength much more than a weakness and having a good old cry can be good for the soul ????????

    Han // http://www.behindthefalselashes.com

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Thank you Han! I completely agree – it’s like a soul cleanse!

  10. What a wonderful read Lisa. Growing up it’s hard to do which is the first one we would cry it out! We don’t have enough time to cry as our life keeps moving forward and we have to focus on the things we need to do. Thanks for sharing this and I hope this can help others who didn’t learn it yet.

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Thank you April – you brought a refreshing perspective to this article. I completely agree with you about how time can affect this. Hopefully this does help us all make time to cry when we need that release.

  11. I agree with this so much!!! Crying is definitely not a sign of weakness. I think crying is a healthy release of emotions. Sometimes you can’t do anything but cry. Crying is also very refreshing. This is a great post to remind people that certain things do not always have to be negative!

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Yes, yes, yes Whitney! Completely agree!!

  12. It’s good to cry, or feel whatever you need to feel, in order to heal 🙂 I find that that helps me greatly to go through something.

    1. Lisa Alioto

      Me too Sheryl! Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

  13. Crying is never a sign of weakness! It is a way of expressing your emotions!

    Love, Amie ❤
    The Curvaceous Vegan

    1. Lisa Alioto

      YES! Exactly Amie! 🙂

  14. I’m not much of a crier in general to be fair, although when I find myself in tears its generally linked to anxiety around something! I definitely would not class it as a sign of weakness – I find it quite archaic to think of it as one to be frank ♥!

    1. Lisa Alioto

      I agree – while I think the connection still exists, happily I believe that it is changing and more and more people are seeing it not as a weakness but just one of many productive emotions.

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